The Naj: A True Story

So on Waygook Wednesday Monique, a Yongsanpoer, pulls out this book about Naju. It's meant to be a textbook to help people learn english, and it's filled with an insane amount of propaganda. Apparently Naju is a "meca for cyclists"! Here's an example (I'm paraphrasing just a bit):

Seren: I heard that Naju is quite famous for it's skate* dating back to the Hannwanyoung-ilsan (that's totally made up) dynasty. Is this true?

Byeong-wan: Why yes it is Seren. It is a very well known fact indeed! Naju and Yongsanpo is quite famous for its delicious and aromatic skate. People travel to Naju from all over the world just to try it. Would you like to accompany me to one of the many scenic and beautiful restaurants in Naju to partake in a sampling of this fine delicacy?

Seren: Why, that would be wonderful. (later) Mmmmm... machisseyo! (delicious in Korean, but for foreigners, often means "interesting" or "wow, that's really gross")

* Skate is... an aquired taste. It is a fish that smells strongly of ammonia (pee!!!) that is often served raw. I think the only way Korean's can stomach it is served with the red chili pepper sauce and wrapped in a leaf. And no, there aren't any scenic/beautiful restaurants in Naju.

The Naj: A True Story

The Naju Mary

Monique: Hey Byeong-wan, I heard that there was a statue of Mary that cried tears of blood.

Byeong-wan: Yeah, it looked pretty gross.

Monique: Did god make it happen?

Byeong-wan: No, no! It was Julia, the hairdresser who owns the statue. She also claimed to have stigmata at one point.

Monique: Cool!

Byeong-wan: Yeah, it was pretty cool.

The Naju Ajumma

Stuart: Who are all of those old ladies I see all over the place in Naju?

Byeong-wan: They're called AJUMMAS. Ajumma's are important to Naju economically because they are needed to work in the rice, pear and melon fields. They work for absurdly low wages and are forced to sell their fruit and various beans on the street or out of trucks.

Stuart: Mmmmm, the Naju pear. I've heard they're delicious.

Byeong-wan: They sure are!!! But make sure you peel of the skin before you eat them or you'll probably die a horrible death.

Stuart: Oh, okay. Why do all of the ajumma's look so similar?

Byeong-wan: A very good question Stuart!! There are certain guidelines to becoming an ajumma.

1. She needs to have a perm.
2. Wear one of those huge visors.
3. Long-sleeved shirts in various garish colour combinations.
4. Flood pants.
5. A cane.


Sigh. Yeah, I need a life. It's Friday afternoon and my last class ended at 12:30pm. Went to the post office to send another package to the parents which ended up being a half hour long ordeal, but an amusing time-killer at the same time. The post-office guy tries so hard to make me understand! He even went online and translated a few words, but when he read it to me, I just wasn't getting it so eventually I asked him to write it in Korean so I could show it to someone to translate for me. He wanted me to know that the post-office would be sending a text message (In Korean!) to my cell phone once the package arrived. I love how much Koreans care. Some woman named Josie from the Phillipines also wrangled my phone number from me so that we could "hang out and have fun". Then I saw James Bond on the street on the way back to work (James Bond is really cute. He's an elementary student from another school in Naju who feels the need to tell me his name is James Bond EVERY TIME HE SEES ME. Yeah, I get it kid, you're 007). Then I saw two cars try to cross one of the bridges at the same time and a guy in a white car scraped the entire length of his car against the cement railing. Dude! Just wait for the other guy to go!!! I accidentally made eye-contact with the driver as I was cringing over the sound. Whoops. So many things can happen on a trip to the post office!!